Soooo it’s been FOREVER since I posted anything!! I’ve been so busy with the girls that I haven’t made the time. Butttttt I did make time to answer some questions for my dear friend Ashley on her blog!! Ya’ll this girl is amazing, and her faith is so inspiring. She and her husband are currently going through infertility, and she started a blog highlighting their stories along with so many other women dealing with infertility as well! I love love love her heart and what she’s doing with this blog. I’m posting our interview questions below, but you should totally check out her blog here.
1. Tell us something about yourself that has nothing to do with infertility.
I have lived in Knoxville my entire life, and don’t plan on leaving! I love to bake and cook (when I have the time!). I absolutely love being outside and anywhere near water! I taught elementary school for 5 years before I had babies. I love to be active; running was my ‘sport’ back in the day, but haven’t quite gotten back there yet 🙂 My husband Brandon is a pastor in Knoxville.
2. What has your infertility journey looked like? Share your story!
We started trying to get pregnant in January 2014. I was so excited to give my parents their first grandchild. I planned it perfectly so that I could deliver the baby in the fall/winter, take the remainder of the school year off, and then resume teaching the next fall. (Haha!) I didn’t want many people to know that we were trying because it would be such a fun surprise when we got to tell everyone we were pregnant! In July, I got pregnant only to find out a week later that we had lost that baby. I was about 6 weeks along. The very next month, my brother and his wife announced that they were pregnant (meaning they got pregnant the same time we did). So that would be my parents’ first grandchild. And they got pregnant literally the first month they tried. We didn’t tell anyone about that miscarriage. I kept all of my bitterness to myself and hid my hurt.
We continued to try to get pregnant. I tried all the things and avoided all the things and kept track of all the things. We began to see doctors, and I was diagnosed with PCOS. I began rounds of Chlomid. After 3 rounds, the decided my dosage wasn’t high enough. My menstrual cycle was completely whacko since the miscarriage, so I went on Progesterone for 10 days (yall, that stuff sucks!! Like, completely made me a different person. Hormones are so crazy and powerful!) We did a couple more rounds of Chlomid and then decided to see a fertility specialist. He suggested IUI in addition to the Chlomid. In May of 2015 I got pregnant again. I went in for bloodwork to confirm the pregnancy, and again lost that one around 6 weeks. (We later found out that I had a bloodclotting disorder which affected my pregnancies.) We did another round of IUI, which was unsuccessful.
My doctor then suggested that I might have endometriosis, and that we would need to perform surgery. I had that surgery in July of 2015. He did find that I had stage 2 endometriosis which was blocking my ovaries. We took about a month to recover, and then did one more IUI. In September of 2015 we found out I was pregnant again. Bloodwork revealed my HCG levels were off the charts high. In October at my first ultrasound, my doctor said, “Hmm.. there’s a few babies in there!”
Aaaaand funny story begins there! 🙂
http://www.momlifeconfessions.com/finding-out/
3. What has God taught you through this journey?
God used those years to remind me that He is ALWAYS faithful, even when we can’t see it. When we are blinded by the pain, hurt, and unfulfilled desires, He is still faithful and He has not forgotten us! He taught me to be patient and trust Him with all things. He taught me that He is always working for our good, and we only need to trust His faithfulness.
Exodus 14:14 “The Lord will fight for you. You have only to be silent.”
4. If you could give advice to someone currently walking through infertility, what would you say to him/her?
Instead of looking forward to the ‘end result’, look around you right now to see what God is teaching you. How is He growing/shaping/using you? What is he teaching you through this?
No matter how hard, difficult, and painful this gets, He is still God. He is still sovereign. And He still loves you deeply. He has not forgotten you. These words may all sound cliche and maybe you’ve heard them a million times. But please take heart in them because there is so much truth!
I wrote a blog post specifically for anyone struggling through infertility (or any other difficult circumstances) full of encouraging words, prayers, songs, and scriptures that helped me during my journey. http://www.momlifeconfessions.com/infertility-resources/
5. How did you and your husband cope during your time of waiting?
We relied heavily on our faith in the Lord. We were there for each other on the bad days. It seemed like one of us was always able to encourage the other on a hard day. We took turns being strong for one another. We both realized that this was something that was unique to most people around us. We could try talking to others about it, but nobody could quite understand the pain like we did. It brought us closer than ever before in so many ways. We cried together and held eachother. We “practiced” a lot. We learned things about fertility and the female body. And throughout the pregnancy (and thereafter), we had to get real close in a lot of ways because there were things I couldn’t do and health complications that he had to help with, and let’s just be honest: there’s a lot of gross stuff that happens.
6. What has life been like after your miracle babies arrived?
Better than I ever imagined! I was absolutely terrified when I found out I was about to have THREE babies at once. Like, how the heck does that even work?! But God provided so much more than I even needed. I was surrounded by incredible family and friends that helped us in so many ways. Jesus provided the strength and energy we needed to care for these girls when realistically we should have been passing out from lack of sleep.
I won’t lie; there are really hard days. I’m exhausted a lot. I get frustrated a lot. Brandon and I argue about silly things a lot. But in all honesty, I love this crazy life. I love watching these babies turn into little girls. I love watching them discover and learn things. I love watching them interact with one another. I LOVE watching Brandon be the sweetest girl dad I ever imagined. We get triple the kisses and triple the love. And as hard as it was to see in the beginning, the Lord really knew what he was doing!!
7. How has the story God has written for you look different from the story you had pictured?
Oh, 100% different! I had my life perfectly planned out. I would have my one perfect little baby that I could take to the grocery and go on lunch dates with friends. And no offense to anyone with singletons, but that’s just not me. I’m the crazy triplet mom with three toddlers hanging on my legs. And I wouldn’t change it for the world!
God wrote my story perfectly for me. He’s a “good, good father” and “perfect in all of His ways.” He knew that those two years of infertility would change me into a stronger woman. He knew that I needed the reminder to be completely dependent on him. He knew that I would be able to handle triplets with His help and guidance. He knew, and I didn’t. I’m so incredibly thankful that He is in charge, and I am not!! This story is 1,000 times better than anything I could have dreamed up, and I’m so glad it’s my life!
Friends, infertility is so incredibly painful and difficult and seemingly forever long. But I am confident the Lord is doing something beautiful in each and every one of you. Your story likely won’t turn out like mine did. Your story may not even result in a pregnancy. But I will say this: God knows what He’s doing. He works in mysterious (and often frustrating) ways, but HE IS WORKING! Trust in His ways and lean not on your own understanding 🙂
